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There’s also no point in dating if it’s a way of passing time in the hope of filling in the gap until the married guy potentially becomes available.
That and whatever you’re prepared to settle for is what you’re going to get. You might view his wife (or girlfriend) as the person who’s robbing you of the opportunity to be with ‘your’ guy.
Choose someone you trust and who can be supportive but tell you that it’s time to quit.
Failing that, share with a professional or even that coworker who has gently taken an interest in you or expressed concern.
Whatever story he’s told you about why he’s with both of you, the cold hard truth is that he’s chosen not to leave because having the best of both worlds is what he chooses (and wants). Blaming her for his infidelity and blaming you for why he hasn’t left ignores the bigger picture of the real issues.
I know that I never saw myself as a sideline woman, no matter how low my self-esteem was. This is the perfect time to think about your short-, medium- and long-term goals, as well as your values.